Spinning plates...how long before something important crashes and breaks?
Can we really do it all? These days women are CEOs and bank presidents. We are surrounded by successful women in business who are role models how to create a rock solid professional resume.
AND YET...as women, we know that as strong as we are, there are
times when we simply can't do it all. Especially when it comes to
caring for a loved one who is experiencing health problems or is
failing.
If we haven't had to deal with it yet, believe me, we will
some day. As former first lady Rosalyn Carter once put it, "There are
only four kinds of people in this world - those who have been
care-givers; those who are currently care-givers; those who will be
care-givers; and those who need care-givers."
Many have asked that I share a story
I wrote about our son Rich taking care of his grandmother in the last
months of her life. It's published in Chicken Soup for the Caregiver's Soul.
Here's
a sneak peak at a small part of "Grandma's Caregiver:"
He knew she was sliding, losing a bit more each day, eating a
bit less, sleeping a bit less. But she seemed to come alive when he
came into her room. Every night he asked her if she wanted to go for a
ride in her wheelchair. He'd lift her frail, bony body gently out of
the bed, understanding the agony it caused her. Two pillows in the
wheelchair didn't help much. "I'm like the princess and the pea, aren't
I?" she'd joke, trying not to cry in pain. He'd wheel her though the
big house, and she'd talk about times long past--the holidays, his mom
and dad getting married in the living room, the bridge parties, and her
rose garden. She didn't seem to notice that this house, once filled
with laughter, had faded scuffed walls and drapes frayed at the hems.
When she was exhausted by her adventure, he gently helped her
back into her huge bed. "Sing to me," she said, smiling past the pain.
She loved music and his songs about dreams, loves, and life lulled her
to sleep, at least for a while.
By the summer they knew their time together was growing short.
They toured the house less often, and now he carried her from room to
room. She didn't weigh a hundred pounds, and it was almost like
carrying a child. Sometimes he'd say, "Grandma, would you dance with me
tonight?" And he gently swayed to the music and sang verses he made up
as they waltzed about the house...
Well now, I won't give away the rest of the story. You'll have to
read it for yourself! But here are my words of wisdom: we need to hear other people's stories of hope and courage. They
let us know that we can be strong when we need to. And we get by with a little help from our friends. Maybe we can't do
it all, but together we CAN do what must be done!